Inventing religion

Religion and politics… two subjects I prefer to avoid.  For the following, I must make an exception.  I didn’t sleep well last night thanks to Mr. ScreamsALot who, I suspect, is teething along with his sister, although Elsa is proving to be a model citizen.  So, I’m a little irritable today.

Back to the subject at hand.  While visiting my family recently my Dad mentioned the following story and I became enraged.  You may be familiar.

In a small Chicago suburb, a Muslim middle school teacher, Safoorah Khan, who had only been on the job for 9 measly months, requested 3 weeks off for a trek to Mecca.  The school district denied the request and a lawsuit, filed by the Justice Department, followed.

Now, please correct me if I’m wrong, but it seems to me that Muslims are only “required” to visit Mecca once during their lifetime.  So, why choose to make the trip during the school year?  And, why on earth is the Justice Department involved?  What happened to separation of Church and State?

Disclaimer: I don’t hate Ms. Khan for being Muslim, just for her poor planning.

This has prompted me to invent a Mommy religion, complete with a Diaper Deity and a Food Fairy.  The scriptures state…

  • Mommy will get a full nights sleep every night.
  • Prayers will be offered to the Diaper Deity in hopes of hard “roll out of the diaper” poos instead of those loose, messy ones.
  • The Food Fairy will be worshiped when meals consisting of anything that isn’t frozen appears on our dinner table.
  • Mommy and Daddy will put, what would be, tax money towards balmy vacations.
  • When Mommy or Daddy wants time off, it will be granted.  No questions asked.  A babysitter will simply appear at the door at said time and, if they don’t, we willl sue the universe for not cooperating.
  • Oh, and the fact that Pete and I got ourselves into this baby mess (love ’em), has no relevancy at all.  What my Mommy religion says, goes.

That’s all, folks.  Thanks for listening.

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