First the doll, now burlap sacks? It’s true. Not only has the doll been re-invented by American Girl, sack racers can now sport hip and trendy sacks, complete with handles. I’m obviously missing something on my quest to become a margarita sipping, beach bum on the shores of the Caribbean.
I’ve been scrounging my brain for the “next great invention” for years when it’s probably been right in front of me this whole time.
Here are a five of my favorite re-inventions:
1. American Girl
It’s a doll, people! And, an expensive one at that. Isn’t it enough that we need to make trips to the doctor with our real (flesh and bone) little ones? Checking a doll into the doctor, waiting for hours to have her head re-attached to her body (giving your little one plenty of time to “want” in the store), then taking the doll out to lunch is NOT my idea of a good time, nor use of funds. American Girl and Disneyland will be avoided in my house at all costs. Note: This is not an invitation to send me a plethora of American Girl dolls sporting tiaras and mouse ears.
Call me old-fashioned, but a sack race is a sack race. Per dictionary.com, a sack is defined as “a large bag of strong, coarsely woven material, as for grain, potatoes, or coal”. A sack with handles (as shown in the picture above) doesn’t allow for as many falls, spills, or tumbles that usually result in uproarious laughter and battle scars that will be talked about at family picnics for years to come. What fun would that be?
3. The Human Hand
Yes, people. Someone has reinvented the human hand. I’m staring into the mirror right now searching for the next big thing!
4. Wishbones
Created to prevent fighting over the sole wishbone at the Thanksgiving dinner table, and for vegetarians! It’s plastic. Ummm… yeah, that bodes well with what most vegetarians probably deem acceptable.
5. Time Out Pad
Way to re-invent the chair and turn time out into a fun, electronic game! As stated previously, a hand-holding time out on the couch will suffice in my house.
That’s it. Just a few thoughts to stimulate your brain on a typical Tuesday. It is Tuesday, right?
Isn’t the point of a sack race that’s it’s a free activity that will keep kids busy? Paying for something to use in a sack race just seems WRONG to me – we used to use pillowcases.
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Heidi Danos Reply:
June 7th, 2011 at 3:08 pm
Totally!
Wow, those all kinda scared me. The last one in particular. Last thing I want is my kids purposely getting in trouble to go to time out. That is just wrong, so very wrong.
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Heidi Danos Reply:
June 8th, 2011 at 9:56 am
Maybe I’m old fashioned at my ripe old age of 39, but I’ll stick with potato sacks, a chair, and my own hands to coddle my little ones.